Dear guardian angels, this business with P is weighing on me. I care for him so deeply and yet I know in my heart that ultimately we are not meant to be together as a couple. But even though I know this, I’m having a hard time parting ways with him. I want him in my life – I enjoy our friendship and our unity, but I feel that it is right to be honest now that my interests are moving elsewhere. But I don’t want to hurt him and I don’t want to lose him. I feel so confused again. I’m slipping back into depression about it I guess – my clear thinking is not present. What is the truth of my relationship with P? What is the best action?There are many thoughts and many issues in the questions that you have asked, but first let us say that all will be well. You are fretting but you are really fretting yourself. You are up against the veil of the ego beliefs and the ego is trying to hold you sway so that you do not think in the penetrating and illuminating way that the spirit is wanting to do. To allow the spirit free reign to be heard in your mind – and to follow the best advice of your spirit – the inner and higher guidance – this is what you truly want to do.
So the challenge is to find that spirit voice and to listen. That is what you are doing here. You have found as you have been conducting these spirit communications for the last half year that the voice of the spirit is kind and good and wise and knowing, and that it reaches into the heart of you and pulls the goodness from within.
And also the spirit is tied to the Universal knowing that all men – all humans – are privy to.
So this suggests to you, and rightly so, that P, too, is reaching into the heart of his own heart and trying to assess what is afoot between you. He, too, wonders what your truth is, and what his own truth is.
You see, this relationship between you has been an adventure in discovering your truth and acknowledging your truth and living your truth. What greater, higher purpose can two people share than this, other than the adventure of discovering the love within, which is also truly a part of what you and P are doing.
So you can safely let go of the fears that say that P will be hurt. There is within the spirit no hurt when the words of love and truth are spoken.
Now, words sometimes are difficult for the ego to hear, but the words heard by the spirit are always understood on a spirit level and are embraced and appreciated.
So have faith that P will know within his spirit, as he does already know within his spirit, what the truth of your relationship is. It is only for your physical ego selves to acknowledge this -fully, and to share in the new discoveries that will come about as a result.
So perhaps you have a fear of death. The fear of death is manifested in all manner in our lives, not just fear of a physical death, of dying, but of things dying: relationships, partnerships, things we own, things we think we own but perhaps do not truly own – acquisitions. We can be afraid of losing a job, losing someone’s love, losing our mobility, losing our health. These can all be translated into a fear of dying because they all signify loss, permanent loss in our minds.
But truly there is no loss in the spiritual kingdom. There can only be loss in the physical world. And so as we connect ourselves, anchor ourselves, encumber ourselves in the physical world, we become attached to our encumbrances, and we fear that if we lose them we will lose who we are, or we will lose our security, or we will lose our identity or our livelihood or our connection to the physical world.
Believe me when I say that there is no connection to the physical world other than the connection that you in your chemical consciousness deem there to be. This is to say that all connections on the earth, in the physical sphere, are electromagnetic, chemical connections that we create as a higher universal mana expressing its power of creation.
So you see, this idea of letting go and allowing life to be all that it can be is one of perception. You ARE your thinking. And as you perceive, you create, and as you create, you reinforce that which you believe.
This is the “magic,” the equation of creation. Think and bring to life. Think and create. Think and BE. You are that which your mind directs you to be.
So think about this concept in the context of P. What do you want to create with him? Can you articulate this?
Yes, I would like to articulate it. I would like to create with P a deeply caring, trusting, reverent friendship. I would like it to be active. I would like it to be full in our minds. I would like to honor it on a regular basis and keep it alive through our communication and through the gifts that we exchange and through our mutual appreciation of one another. I want him to be in my life as a special, kindred spirit who I love but who I accept as a friend who will, if it is his plan, find another lover someday who will give him what he truly seeks, the fullness of an intimate partnership. I treasure him. I want to share more. But I also want my freedom to explore another relationship, an intimate relationship. I hope that he will understand my need to be free to explore these possibilities.
It is good that you have defined this for yourself. Sometimes it is hard to put in words the feelings that swim within the mind. So this is good.
Now, to bring about the changes that will need to take place in order for your vision to manifest, you will need to articulate your vision to P. You can speak to him softly and gently and assure him of your intentions, your commitment to remain in his life, to sanctify the friendship with a bond of trust and commitment to serve each other’s vision of possibility.
It may be that for starters P may be reluctant to share your vision or present his own. But in his heart his vision is clear and becoming clearer. And as you both begin to share, this will open up new realms of understanding.
Now, there is the issue of truth that you must both speak of and acknowledge. Truth is one of the highest ethical values, and it is of paramount importance that you both understand its value and its meaning in cementing the bond that you seek to preserve and develop. There can be no untruth if a soul is to grow and prosper in the soul and spirit realm. You cannot say one thing and do another. You cannot hide something in the shadows. You cannot omit one thing and illuminate another. Truth is the spiritual brightness and openness of the soul that knows no blackness or grey, no boundaries. If there is grey or if there is a boundary, then the truth is relative, and it loses its potency.
So it is important that you fully disclose all to P, or rather all that you are comfortable disclosing at this time, and move forward on the path of truth as a shared pursuit. For each of you, the challenge of truth is real, but it is a challenge so very worthy of pursuing because it separates your intentions from baser intentions of sharing in friendship. To share friendship IN TRUTH, this brings the spirit, the truth of spirit and all that is spirit into your midst, and allows it to flourish.
How do we seek truth and share truth? By being our word. In the beginning was the word. And all that was swam in the sea of thought, and the thought was the Word, the eternal Logos, the eternal, all encompassing Thought of the Creative Spirit that externally is known as God but internally is known as the Great Spirit, the True Spirit, the One Spirit, the Godhead, the God Self, the King of Kings and Queen of Queens, the Highest Higher Self, the One. Let it Be.
There are many words for the Love and Truth and Equality of Self, but all boil down to one principle: we are one as the family of man, and as we do unto the least of this family, we do unto ourselves on every level. Our highest level is our Godself, our connection to the All That Is, the Heavenly Spirit.
So, BE truth and BE love and show this in all that you do with P, so that you may elevate yourselves to the level where your ethics are unimpeachable and where your mutual appreciation will be intact always, in all ways.
P is thinking of you. His heart is with you, as yours is with him. Trust this, know this. Be the truth and the love in action. Speak from your heart, and respect and value P as he speaks from his. Share in openness. Speak truth.
Do not be afraid but trust that you are both spirit consciousness in action and there is never loss as long as you honor the spirit that you are.
Be your spirit and share this with P and honor his spirit. Trust him. Know that all will be well.
